You are all so very kind and I truly do appreciate the good wishes.

I had my first session, so now I know better what to expect on a daily basis for the next few weeks. I find that there is nothing I need to do but live in the present moment and show up on time.

I’ve been warned that possible side effects may affect my food choices at some point, but since I doubt that anyone will be insisting on sugar being essential we’ll figure it out when/if.

When you find a system that works, you can tweak it here and there to fit your life. Can’t fast this week? Pick it back up as soon as you can and just keep moving forward. I’m making no hard and fast promises right now about specifics because I don’t yet know the variables. But I can say that I’ll be staying within my own system, because it’s part of who I am now.

It’s amazing how much else there is out there when food is no longer the centre of your universe!

Interesting question, Fuvvie: pragmatism or acceptance? Pragmatism, certainly, in my natural approach to solutions, but that alone has never brought me the success with food issues I needed. There was a sudden shift in my thinking when the light bulb went on and everything clicked into place. I realised that I had to stop fighting against — and start working with. Acceptance was the missing element and finding it has made all the difference.

There is no “diet” to fight against now. My food plan is 100% fitted to ME, aided by the best ideas I’ve culled from the advice and example of others. It includes only food I love but balanced in a way never possible before. It makes losing weight effortless because I’m going in the direction my body wants to go — towards health. No kicking and rebellious screaming required.

This same approach can be applied to everything in my life. I don’t seem to encounter difficult people anymore. Problems have solutions. For the unsolvable there is still acceptance.

All of us have challenges — that’s just life. Mine happens to be cancer at the moment but the principle is the same. You do what you can with what you’ve got, find the best solution possible, and allow in people to do what you cannot. Allowing people in has been the most difficult part of my journey but by far the most rewarding.

Treatment is going well. Side effects may begin to appear a fortnight in but so far so good.

I’ve had to tweak my food plan to adjust for a few issues but still managed to lose another pound. I accept that for the moment weight loss takes a back seat to general health but it’s no excuse to go off the rails. And after all this, I can no longer imagine any excuse good enough!

18 st./10 lbs.

That choir practice sounds like just the thing to release a lot of stress, Fuvvie — and I know you have more than your fair share at the moment. You’re doing so well with all the balancing of the needs of others so I’m glad you have carved out some time for yourself, too.

I do love to read all sorts of things, although I find myself looking for fairly light stuff at the moment. Buttonboots will appreciate that I’m re-working my way through the entire Chalet School series as my fall-asleep aid!

I’m another pound down, which is a relief as I’ve had to modify my food plan several times now due to the therapy. The less weight I have to carry, the better.

18 st./9 lbs.

Wednesday Weigh-In time and I’m very pleased to be down another 2 pounds. It’s mostly because the radiation is beginning to play merry hell with my digestion, but hey! a loss is a loss.

The changes I’ve been temporarily forced to make to my diet: reduce fats and fibre, and eliminate dairy/spices/caffeine/fruit. This, combined with my own ban on sugars etc., leaves me with a bit of veg plus meat and eggs. I’ve been enjoying lots of home-made chicken soup.

I was initially a bit worried about having to moderate my food plan, having got to where I was really doing well with it. With earlier weight loss attempts, a minor deviation was usually an excuse to chuck the whole thing in. But these adjustments are just for the next few weeks so I can do this. Also, without the sugar, my eating can be rational and sane.

Otherwise, I’m still feeling generally quite well in my third week of treatment, with 3 more to go.

Fuvvie, I listened to that song and it’s hilarious — I hope you have so much fun singing it!

As for the Indian feast, sometimes we need an experience like that — just to drive home the lessons we have learned. It’s rarely as enjoyable as we thought it would be, especially the next day. It must be hard not to join in when everyone around you is tucking in, but maybe you can find a clever way to cook some of those gorgeous flavours into stuff you can eat and keep a few portions in the freezer. Curry over cauliflower rice is lovely, and you can find recipes for low carb naan online.

One thing you mentioned is particularly important, I think: under-eating on a non-fast day will do you no favours in the long run. Resolve collapses when we are starving. I love LCHF because I never felt that deprivation yet lost weight easily. It works so well in tandem with IF.

18 st./7 lbs.

Wednesday Weigh-In with a slightly delayed but happy report of another pound less to carry around.

18 st./6 lbs.

It’s kind of you, Fuvvie. I know some of the pressures you are under right now yourself and I think it is you who is more rightly worthy of admiration.

It’s four weeks down, two to go for me now. I’m feeling better than I expected so that’s a huge plus. All I have to do is keep showing up every day and let others do their thing — not something I’ve been willing to trust to previously but there’s a lesson for me in that somewhere.

Wonderful news for you and your husband, Fuvvie! I’m so happy to hear it. There’s one thing you can cross off your worry list.

I found that cheese/PSA connection you mentioned, cold pizza, very interesting. I passed it along to my father who is having problems along that line — and he does love his cheese! Thanks for mentioning it.

So. I am now finished my 5 weeks of regular radiation. Next week, it’s 3 specifically targeted sessions and I’ll be done on Friday. First thing on my agenda will be — what else? — a cup of tea! Then I will know that life is back on track.

I think I’m doing fairly well, all things considered. I give credit for that to having been able to modify my food as I went along. I certainly wouldn’t have managed that 6 months ago. I was unconnected to what was happening to my body with food once it passed my tongue. Now, I can feel what is happening and respond with a brain that gets it. Information is power!

There is so much to learn from all of this. One of the most important things I’ll take away from the people I have met is how much attitude matters. Perspective changes everything and even a small shift can bring those light-bulb moments to move us forward.

I have this image of you bashing yourself over the head with an inflatable Lolly-on-a-stick, Fuvvie…. I have terrible balance so no pedestals for me! Thank you for the kind words, however. They mean a great deal.

I had some slower patches, too. Just keeping moving forward and it’s all going to work out well for both of us.

You’re so right about excessive screen time for children — adults, too, come to that. Hope you all enjoyed the water park and got thoroughly soaked.

It’s Wednesday Weigh-In and I have the pleasure to announce a drop of 3 lbs. this week. Exciting stuff, as I’m getting close to breaking the 18 stone barrier.

Only one more session, then…. TEA! I can scarcely wait.

18 st./1 lb.

Ah, yes. That first cup of tea. How I dwelt longingly on the moment when caffeine would be mine again at last. My big mug was ready. My favourite brew steeping. I took my first sip. It was… absolutely disgusting!

The radiation leaves a metallic taste in the mouth at times and I’d almost lost awareness of it. Seems that something about tea makes it much worse — like biting down on foil when you have metal fillings.

Yikes! I think that first blissful cup may have to wait a little longer yet. I made do with coffee instead.

Other than that, I am extremely happy to be finished treatment. Now I feel that I can begin to work out a new normal, and I hope to be fully back into LCFH within a fortnight. It’s not that I haven’t lost weight, because I have, but these weeks have driven home the difference between a “diet” and a “food plan”. One I struggle to stay on, the other is just — how I live now. And I know where I’d rather be.

You’re going to help a lot of people with your service as co-ordinator this month, Fuvvie. It would be an honour if anything I’ve written can help you as well. Quote away!

This is a week of trying to return to normal. Lingering side effects mean slower progress than I’d like but I’m getting there. I’m catching up on sleep. Best of all, I can once more enjoy my tea — although it’ll be a long time before I forget that first mouthful!! I have heard of Rooibos tea but never tried it. I’ll put it on my “adventure list” for when I feel brave.

Wednesday Weigh-In again, after missing last week. I didn’t break through the barrier, but — I did hit 18 stone exactly! I’ll take it.

It’s been a rough couple of weeks. The fatigue finally kicked in and my attempt to return to normal eating was premature. I was getting frustrated and a whole herd of elephants invaded the room once the routine of daily treatment was over. I took an offer of a change of scenery and it did me good to get away for a few days. The solitude gave me a chance to regain some perspective, so I feel, if not quite back on track, definitely somewhere in the right station.

You’re quite right, Fuvvie — nothing is ever quite the same again. But it’s just life and the balancing act we have to perform every day. There’s only ever today, no matter what my mind insists on fussing about. I’m so glad to hear that you’ve got a handle on things and turned your thinking around. Once we click into the right spot it just seems so easy! We ask ourselves why we didn’t do this YEARS ago, but we do what matters when we’re ready.

It’s good to be back.

18 st., on the nose

Get ready to pop that cork, Fuvvie! I’m back in the swing of things and feeling much more like myself again.

I was getting frustrated by the food restrictions necessary to cope with side effects, and I pushed a little too quickly to get back to normal. File that under “Man proposes, God disposes” and consider me schooled.

It’s been a good reminder that I have zero control over the rate of weight loss. I’m not making any specific goals of X amount lost by Y date, although I do find that I enjoy having a goal like smashing through the next stone barrier. I need to feel like the winner I am here, and averaged out over the last seven months I’ve lost something under 2 lbs. a week. But averages don’t tell the whole story, as some weeks have been much higher and some have been nil results.

What I do have is full control over is what I put in my mouth. It’s up to me to take responsibility for my choices. Beyond that, my body is the one in charge of the rate of change. Some weeks, I’ve thought that I “deserved” more. Other weeks, I get a drop I didn’t expect.

There’s a balancing act, between trying to see the big picture and zooming in on the moment — on experiencing one meal at a time. On having a general direction but not trying to hammer down details so far in advance that I feel trapped. On preparation, not regimentation.

I value freedom so highly. Some might think, looking on from the outside, that my LCHF/5:2 path appears restrictive. When people have asked me how I’ve lost the weight I can see the horror on their faces at the thought of giving up sweets and bread. But from my perspective it’s given me the key to opening up the world again.

The dietary confirmation I am taking away from the last couple of months is this: while I did continue to lose weight, neither my body nor my mind was satisfied with the low-fat regime. Even for weight loss I couldn’t keep that up for long, and only forced circumstances kept me on it. It had nothing to do with calories, I might add. They were adequate. But I felt unsatisfied — the old restless aimless standing-in-the-kitchen-wanting-something hunger. What stops that for me is the addition of healthy fats. The calories may be the same but what a difference! Losing weight, not hungry, not obsessing about food. Seems a good deal to me.

And that’s really the point: it’s what works for me. Others here are doing just as well on what works for them and seeing that gives me encouragement to follow my own path. I have a direction and a plan — and a whole heap of gratitude for those around me sharing as they go.

Just a quick post for my Wednesday Weigh-In before I head out the door. Pop that cork, Fuvvie — I’m 3 pounds down and that barrier is well and truly smashed!

17 st./11 lbs.

Thanks so much, Fuvvie and coldpizza. I’m really feeling much more like myself again.

I can identify so strongly with the frustrations you have both expressed recently about struggling to move forward after initial success. One of the things I did worry about during treatment was whether I would be able to pick back up and move on with my food plan afterwards. Make that not “able”, but “willing”. New territory for me.

Perhaps this is a good time to open a discussion about how to overcome self-sabotage since we are so prone to it.

Consider this. We find 5:2 and it works a treat. We lose weight and are so excited to finally have a solution for life. It’s easy! It works! We’re gung-ho! Then, there’s a special food occasion, or a slip, or a crisis — or resentment or boredom. A treat makes it better, and we promise to work twice as hard next week. Before we know it, we’re 2 weeks behind and the scales are no longer giving good news.

Worst case scenario, we give up, disgusted with ourselves for our weakness. It’s another “diet” failure. I’ve literally had hundreds of those in the past.

What goes wrong? 5:2 works, and we say we want the weight loss. We know what to do. In a logical world, that would be enough — but in a logical world I’d have never become the size of house, either!

Fuvvie, you put your finger on it when you wrote: ” When all this is in your psyche, and such pleasurable feelings arise with the memories, there’s little wonder that we fight so much against restrictions now. All that programming for all those years.”

For emotional eaters, this is not a “food” fight. Food is our drug of choice but if we only focus on the drug we miss the real issue — which is, what is driving us to use it?

A lasting solution requires personal change. There are many ways to do this but outside help can speed up the process. I used a few sessions of cognitive therapy and found it very helpful in seeing patterns and applying solutions.

Change isn’t easy and we resist it, but what it does is bring you back to the real you. Only the warped and broken parts are changed in such a process — why do we cling to them so?

Perception is so important: it can change “restriction” into “freedom”. Are we on a “diet” or living a “way of life”? Are we doing what we think we should (resentment) or what we truly want (freedom)?

If what you’re doing now isn’t working, doing it twice as hard won’t help. Let’s work smarter, not harder — and support each other as we figure out some solutions. This is for life, my friends. No more diets for us!

I am back again after a month away helping with a family issue. This has not been the easiest year, all round. One of the first things I did was get on the scales and they confirmed what my clothes were already telling me — I am up nine pounds!

It’s very disappointing, but not unexpected. While away, I stopped doing my fast days and my carb intake was significantly higher although still of the healthier variety.

It is SO much easier to put weight on than to take it off! I’m looking at the calendar and thinking that it’ll take me at least another month to get back to where I was a month ago. I feel angry and disappointed with myself — and that’s a dangerous place.

This is the point where I have to stop and regroup my thoughts. Life isn’t a straight line. Stuff happens. Perfectionism is not my friend. This is not a race. Time to re-focus on my own needs and move ahead.

Today is a fast day. It feels good to be home.

Wednesday Weigh-In, and I’ve shifted 4 of those 9 lbs I gained while away. I’ll start the official clock again when I’m back to where I was, but for the moment I’m just happy to be moving in the right direction again.