I will give up CL, Annette, I promise. But it has to be next week’s goal! One kraken at a time. 🙂

That seems fair Jade. I am certain that you will feel better and able to cope with cravings once the CL is ditched. Lemon water sounds lovely too MichellMB. I am glad that the comparing/adding is helping Jade. Once I started to think whether I would rather have homemade chicken korma with rice OR an almond Croissant, there was really no contest. The result is that I haven’t had one for ages. I suspect that I will be very disappointed the next time I do, it is unlikely to be as fabulous as I imagine, as you found out with the doughnuts. I also use a pedometer and aim to walk the recommended 10,000 steps a day. It has a calorie count on it too and when I started to think about how far I would have to walk to use up the calories of chocolate, I came to the conclusion that it wasn’t worth it. I have noticed that MFP seems to equate how far you would have to walk with foods too. It gets clearer by the day why I got fat and stayed that way for so long!

Onwards and downwards Fast Friends…..

Ha, yes Michel you ARE good! Way to go, dusting that pesky cookie kraken. They seem to breed like rabbits at your office. The lemon idea sounds great – had a DC the other day with a squeeze of fresh lemon, and the lemon was the best part.

Good FD for me, I think right around 500. Hard to say what a “roasted chicken breast” really is on MFP, but I had half a piece and chose a mid-range count, so with some veggies it was 439. Then I had to bake brownies for tomorrow so allowed myself to lick the spoon, so…60ish cals? Not really much on it. But I think I like the spoon better than the final result.

Now to just behave tomorrow and Friday, right? Wish we could all meet up Sat morning for brunch! Croissants, kolaches, pecan maple plaits, Krispy Kremes, and a chocolate RIVER.
xx jade

Well, I had two skittles as part of a game during my sign language class and then got home to find the BATHROOM IS FINALLY FINISHED!!! Hallelujah. To celebrate boyf had got a chinese takeaway. I had a third of my portion, coming in at I guess around 600 (newsflash – a normal portion would be 1800!!!). Not perfect but I’ll take it!
Good work everyone. Now to face the nonFD kraken and win.

No Kitty, please don’t go! Well you can go to Mexico but don’t leave US. 🙂 We are having some success this week and also some failure. Just as always, so we press on with each new day. I will admit to the group that I owe my successes this week in part to an actual virus 🙁 (see I SAID that’s what it could be!)

I had a summer of very little actual success. Some days I had to just accept tiny victories like only gaining a lb over the weekend instead of 3. Or only eating 2500 cals when I could have scarfed up 3000.
The Normal Eating book might interest you, mostly because she describes how truly gradual a process this is. Like simply pausing to think and making a conscious choice to eat ANYTHING be it a box of doughnuts or an entire cake. Stopping to think gradually turns into something bigger. I promise it does.

Hugs to you and I hope you can feel the love. We have all been there and will be there again no doubt. The most important thing is not to give up. xxxxx jade

By the way, did I ever tell you about the time they put me in charge of our lab’s weekly coffee meetings? TUPPAWARES OF BISCUITS IN MY FILING CABINET FOR A WHOLE YEAR. Let’s just say I spend a considerable amount of my own money replenishing the stocks I had eaten. I’m still shaking the biscuit crumbs out of my paperwork….

Kitty: It pains me that you don’t think there is a place for you here. I joined this thread because my eating was out of control. I was eating a pint of ice cream a day (NFDs) on the way home from work. This is the only place I have found outside of therapy where someone understands. This is a place where we share the successes and all the screw ups. I was able to resist cookies yesterday, but the day before I ate at least 10 plus cake. We are here because we understand how hard the struggle is. I don’t think I can do this alone and with this forum I don’t have to.

Stay strong and believe…..small steps

Kitty: Since it is your health at risk, have you thought about seeing a professional. I have greatly benefited from counseling. I don’t want to insult or offend you, but having someone help you understand what is going on could lead to the changes you want. We are self exploring on this forum, but it is not the same as being able to really open up to an understanding/non-judging person with the experience to guide you in your unique situation.

Whatever you do don’t leave us. I will continue to pray for your health and that you find strength to face your battles.

Hugs, M

As Michel said, I don’t think I could do this alone. I’m so grateful to have a place to run hide OR to be proud about some small victory. And to laugh, good lord I appreciate the pure joy in hearing your wacky stories and reducing mine to silliness, dusted off to try again. Laughing makes the shame less powerful. The more shame I feel, the more I am going to eat in my car out of revenge? Heaven knows against whom (myself? skinny people? people who can eat doughnuts in a real restaurant, not a car? my husband for leaving me alone or, conversely, for NOT leaving me alone? YES ALL OF THEM). Ha, notice my husband is to blame NO MATTER WHERE HE IS.

OK, off to class with me. Keep laughing or you might cry (thanks, mom :))

For the record, I have almost done 5:2 with real tdees for (drum roll) ONE WEEK. Almost one week. Never previously, just could NOT figure out why I weigh the same as I did in May!
Two more days, we’ll see. TDEE is a very foreign concept to me.

Bless you all, you lovely gang of people.
I’m happy to say I’ve pulled myself out of the mire I’ve been in….self destruction is not an attractive trait. Apologies for sounding the alarm and behaving like a mentalist, it took that and some lovely replies to snap some sense back into me.
Michel – you’re so right. It is my health at stake and I can’t just feign blissful ignorance. I hear what you’re saying about talking to a professional, it’s something I’ll turn to if I can’t get a handle on it in a month.
I think when I analyse myself (irony – I’m doing a psychology degree!) I realise I’m just greedy! Yes, emotional eating is a factor, but the fact is, I just like stuffing my face. Just like when I was a smoker, I loved smoking and didn’t want to stop. But I did, and I will stop stuffing my face too.
What a journey we have all been on together – I hope I can join you all in celebrating some weight loss soon. FD tomorrow!

I just passed ice cream shop without stopping! Woot! I have been eating imaginary ice cream all day. It worked.worked. now if I can control myself when I get home it’ll be a good day.

Thanks to Annette’s wizardry I made it in at TDEE.
I had to skip the free breakfast to do it, but if I can lose something this week it will be worth it.

Stay strong & fast on!

Hi to you wonderful folk and Kitty – PLEASE DON’T GO!!!! I say this with a great deal of conviction because I’m sitting at my computer scoffing chocolates that I’m really not enjoying and thinking about what a FU week it’s been so maybe I’ll log on for some inspiration….
I am definitely struggling at the moment and it is psychology not maths that is my issue as ever. I know this because after a year on 5:2 and a very significant 55lb loss, food is still the only thing that can make me feel better, faster than anything else in the world. Sure it’s fleeting, sure it’s gilded with regret, sure it’s not my higher, adult self making the choice but that’s how I know my issues are psychological. I know full well that 600 crap calories can be substituted for 300 healthy calories with much greater nutritional value but at the point I want to inhale fat and sugar it is totally, completely irrelevant and meaningless. The knowledge of calorie value and nutrition is what can make a difference for someone whose basic reason for being overweight was eating too much but not realising why they were getting fat. I have always known why I was fat, no magic at all. On most days of the last year (and many more of them now, so this is not a rant of despair) I have been able to make a choice to do the right thing but it is still a daily/weekly struggle and at this point I suspect this will always be the case.
So, this week I’ve had 2 FUFD’s and it’s been a lay-down mesire for Kraken of all kinds but I’m still going to drop in and read what you’re all up to, celebrate your victories as they give me great heart that I will come out of this very soon and be ready to slay Kraken left, right and centre. Spring xx

Hi annette, I appreciate your thoughts on this as while we all have an individual path to tread we can certainly shine a light on the way for each other. And I can only agree that it is about small changes that make the difference – as a Buddhist I understand that every small choice/decision I make is literally creating my future. However, as others have said on here, it is not a lack of knowing (about calories, nutrition, how 5:2 works or even how habits are formed) but a lack of doing that is the issue. That’s why the emphasis for me (and I think for many others on here) is on the psychological issues I am dealing with. It may well have been shown that it takes 6 weeks to change a habit (I have often looked for the evidence for this, but there don’t appear to be any rigorous studies) but now that I’ve been doing 5:2 for a year I can honestly say that I have not found it getting any easier or found that new habits are taking the place of old. There have been many months when I’ve eaten no sugur or refined carbs and remained ‘good’ based on a 2 x FD and 5 x NFD’s at TDEE and it has meant I have lost a lot of weight, but the formation of new habits are not a part of my experience. There is really only mindfulness and my ability to remain ‘mindful’ fluctuates and I suspect this will always be the case although I would be happy beyond measure if I became one of those people who doesn’t need to think about food every single day to remain a normal weight.

Indeed I am also happier at my current weight, taking solace in fighting to stay here (the body DOES seem to dig in) and hoping also to reduce further to my goal. It is only with 5:2 that I have ever maintained a weight loss for more than a week or so. So for the last few months, I suppose I’ve actually been on maintenance. When I hit goal, that is going to be fun.

For now, I think a big new habit I need to learn is paying attention to what I actually burn each day. Good GRIEF that is much less than I thought. And getting ever lesser as I age. But as our resident wizard would say, that is the math of it.

Definitely NOT feeling emotionally satisfied (or even hunger-satisfied sometimes) with TDEE yet, but who knows, it could happen. My FU yesterday was my own fault for not knowing how many calories are in a brownie – I honestly thought “I had a light lunch, how much could these hurt.” Well OUCH. Not a disaster but effing MFP said “YOU ATE TOO MUCH, MATHY MATH MATH.” OK, well someday I can have that much, because maintenance expects me to lighten up a bit (figuratively of course) otherwise there would not be 1-2 FD built right in.

Fine. Must regroup my wandering mind and accept that I am NOT 8 feet tall and my TDEE is less than I thought it was. Wahwah not fair but oh well, I shall move on and see what I can do with this bit of information. It will either become a habit or it will just be a bit difficult (though less so than with other plans) until I hit goal. (Note to self: stop reading threads where people talk about how easy it is.) When I look at all this in a positive light, I realize that maintaining over the summer is quite an accomplishment. Maintaining is hard, as we ALL know. So a “plateau” = I am a KICKASS maintainer.

Let’s keep up the fight, Clubbers. Find your personal victories in this fight and capitalize on them. Attack bad habits on a one-by-one basis until you find success with each one. As much as we’d love to be disciplined, non-snacking, water-only drinking, paragons of good health NOW, and that is a wonderful goal, it is a long process for anyone who’d join this thread, and little victories along the way will get us there eventually.

xxx jade

Feeling a little put out by the scale this morning. I worked hard yesterday to stay in TDEE and expected to stay flat. Instead I had a small gain. Now, I know all about water weight and how the scale does not always reflect correctly (blah, blah, blah), but darn it I need my hard work to be reflected on the scale. Especially when they’re bagels & burritos in the office this morning. The weigh in tomorrow is the only thing keeping me on the path today. I committed to losing weight this week!…….I’m tired of losing & then gaining the same 4 freaking lbs every week. I want new numbers to look at!

Someone needs to invent an air cake. And not one I have to imagine eating, either. It is flat ridiculous how many calories they have. And the size piece I’d really like has even more (is half a cake a “piece”?).

Michel, I hate the scale. Mine actually went down a bit, just to mess with me. I.e., “brownies? Sure, no problem. I’ll add those to your hips on SATURDAY.” NO NOT THEN! Or maybe my TDEE is higher than I thought? Guess I’ll find out tomorrow.

Well, I’m up for the challenge again next week. This TDEE stuff is enlightening, in a frustrating, pain-in-the-ass kind of way. I expect that at some point I’ll get the hang of actually being flexible, having a few too many on special occasions and compensating with fewer other days. And by the way, I don’t consider driving a “special occasion” although I’ve had some memorable times in my car.

What has become of Queen, Penguin, others who haven’t dropped in lately…? Maybe they found a classier bunch of misfits to hang out with 🙂
I DOUBT THAT, hahaha.

See you at the scale – TTFN xx jade

Now I am eating an imaginary lemon polenta cake (yes, I mean the entire cake, because it’s imaginary so why not). Sounds so yummy.

You are such a fabulous bunch of people.
After the comments about motivation I realized that I had omitted in error, some of the other things that made me want to lose weight and put some effort in. I genuinely believed that I was the person who the 5:2 would not work for and I simply couldn’t believe it when the lbs started to shift and my shape started to change.
I had always wanted to take part in our local half marathon(13.1 miles), just to get round uninjured, time was never important as I was going to be very very slow and a non sporty 52 years old. I started a couch to 5K programme convinced that I was never going to be able to run further than the end of the road. I got better but also knew that the more weight that I lost, the easier that it was going to be with far less body to haul round. That was my incentive when I started this way of life and 3 months later I hauled this body round and completed the course. The end of race photo showed me how much more fat i needed to lose, lycra is not very forgiving! Then a trip to the doctors when I had vertigo, showed that I had dangerously high blood pressure and there was some pressure to take statins. I struck a deal with my doctor and had 3 months to lose more weight, which I did. My GP was stunned with my weight loss and my blood pressure was also normal. It was quite an incentive to keep going and I did find it difficult to keep that level of determination once I had be given the all clear.
But I am quite determined to lose these same lbs before the end of the year and not to put back festive lbs this year or any year again.

Annette: Thanks for sharing.
It always helps to remember where we got our strength to just “walk past” from.

All calories count towards TDEE!

Kitty, Sheryl Canter discusses just that in her Normal Eating book. She advises just stopping before eating to ask am I hungry? Food can only cure hunger (yeah, I laughed at that, too, but keep reading).

So if I’m not hungry, what am I? Usually I’m either bored (wanting the entertainment of food) or celebrating something. So I’m mostly a happy eater. Others eat when upset (mad, disappointed, stressed, etc.). Either way, the common tie is that hunger is not the real trigger.

So, as a first step, she says to just stop, briefly, before eating. Try to figure out what is driving us to eat, if it’s an emotion and not hunger. See if it’s possible to satisfy the need with something that will actually fill it. E.g., I’m upset with myself for putting off a task. I should go do the task instead of eating. HAHA, I know, I should do that. I am smart sometimes and can multi-task 😉

So, sometimes I think it over and either can’t figure out the underlying need or don’t want to deal with it, and I go ahead and eat. It’s still better than mindless eating, and it WILL eventually lead to more mindful eating.

I honestly don’t understand how that could work (if I stop to think and still eat), but I think it does. I am not quite as mindless as before. None of this is easy nor is it a short road. I’m gathering all the tips I can. xxxx jade

How did everyone do today?

I could have done better and I could have done much worse. I did my best to enter everything I ate into MFP. I’m just a little over my TDEE. Not really bad considering all the temptation I had at work today.

Here’s to finding your motivation!

Forgot to say…
Annette – many thanks for sharing your journey with us….I found it personally very relevant as I too have to lose weight for health reasons. It’s very inspiring and I applaud you for managing to go from hypertensive to having a normal blood pressure. It’s about so much more than how we look isn’t it….I had always wanted to lose weight to look better, until my health declined and it actually became necessary to lose it to be safe for surgery. Now it’s no longer just “oh well I’ll stay fat, I can be happy as I am” because that option has been removed. I wish you continued good health and hope you continue to share your experiences with us.