Hello all π
I’m Maria, a woman from Denmark, 32 years old and I live at home with my mom at the moment.
2 years ago I went through a massive depression, a major breakup and in the end also a suicide-attempt. Before that I actually managed to lose about 25 kilos on my own by eating LCHF and in the end also playing around with 5:2 and 4:3 fasting.
It wasn’t till I started fasting I got the best visual effects. I’ve always been “big boned” but I hit a weight that said: 58 kilos and im only 163 centimeters tall. I was looking good.
I never actually felt like I had much support back then when I was fighting depression AND weightloss and my friends at that time even started commenting that they though I was being fanatic and maybe I should’nt lose anymore. I’ve always been realistic and I know I was NOT being underweight at all, my boyfriend at the time even supported me on this.
But OMG it was sooooo rough and hard and stressfull every day and then feeling like you are not even being “padded on the shoulder” when you finally are SO close to your goal – which was 55 kilos.
After my depression and the other stuff I completely stopped caring about weight, food, health, everything.. I just wanted to drink and eat whatever I wanted and I started going out drinking alot, so of course the weight came back rapidly, since I never went in to any maintenance weight period.
I am now sitting at a whopping 92.1 kilos π
I have wanted to start back on a healthy WOE soooo many times i’ve lost count, but every time I start “something” happens and it’s just another excuse to start “Next monday” or whatever.
I’m currently seeing a nutritionist and being guided on what I should try and focus on in the daily and im so happy with is, but it’s still SO hard for me to actually stick with it and just “fight through” the first rough week cause I rarely have any energy and I don’t sleep well. I suffer from chronic pain after an accident where I fell down some stairs and hurt my hip, so this is always a constant stressor for me, but I do what I can to make my life as comftable as possible and im an EXPERT in self-pity-comfort-eating and always have been.
Today I decided I would try a fast day…. It’s only 2 days a week and it would boost my weightloss alot I’m sure… How hard can it be, right?
I was out earlier and I went for a long walk and I am really proud of what happend. In the store I walked by these cookies on sale that I have been DIEING to taste and the last time I wanted them, they were all gone, so I never got around to taste them, oh well, too bad.
Then I walk by them and instinctly I told myself “Maria…. you know, there will ALWAYS be something “on sale” that are something you really want, when you are out shopping. ALWAYS. Stop using it as an excuse to postpone your weightloss, cause you have done this EVERY single time. Stop it. JUST STOP IT!”
Its almost 7pm now and I just had some lovely dinner with my mom. Fresh pasta with peas, parmesan, lemonjuice, oliveoil, salt and pepper and it was sooooo delicious. Other than that I’ve had zero-calorie softdrinks and water.
I ate for 700 calories. I know according to the “front page” I’m supposed to eat 500 calories, but I swear I’ve read somewhere that woman could go up to about 5-800 calories with the same effect? Did I totally misunderstood something or?
Even if im supposed to only eat 500 calories, I AM DAMN PROUD of myself for actually doing it today π This is huge for me!
I am gonna write in here on my fast days, I expect my next one to be on sunday.
Wish me luck and thanks for reading π
– Maria
5:44 pm
23 Aug 18