From bulimia to fasting

This topic contains 11 replies, has 7 voices, and was last updated by thehiddenyogi 9 years, 4 months ago.

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kosiejelly

12:21 pm
20 Aug 14
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I’ve had food issues for more than a decade now. I’ve never understood how people can look at, say, a big cake and not want to eat the whole thing in one go. It’s led to me having sustained periods in my life of massive overeating, which in turn led to me purging to try and not let my weight get out of control (and shamefully so that I could carry on eating after I felt full).Basically my eating has been out of control for a very long time, with relatively short periods of diet and exercise to bring me back to a happy weight.

Now I’m doing 5 2 and for the first time in what seems like forever I feel in control of what I’m eating. I’m enjoying the taste of food rather than stuffing it in as fast as possible. I’m choosing my food for both nutritional value and calorific content instead of just heading straight to the naughty aisles in Tesco. Also, importantly, I don’t now panic when I’m in the supermarket, knowing I’m on the way to an overeating session and hating my brain for not stopping me. It’s much healthier on my bank balance too!

I think it’s down to a combination of having simple rules to follow, of not feeling like I’m denying myself as I’m never more than a day away from eating normally and of seeing the inspirational stories posted on forums like this one.

It also helps loads that I finally told my partner about my addiction and he’s positively supporting me – having everything out in the open is such a relief and actually removes a lot of the urge to binge (a habit that feels very secret). Knowing that he’ll ask me about how my eating is going is very motivating – I don’t want to have to lie or to make him feel let down. We’ve started to exercise together a couple of times a week too – I’ve always had better control of myself when I’m exercising regularly.

So far I’ve completed 4 weeks and have lost 10 lbs (I’d estimate that the first 5 was water weight so overall a nice steady pace). I want to lose another 28, though would be happy with 21

I’d love to hear about anybody else’s battles with food and the hold it has on them and if fasting has helped you control it.

Amy C.

12:52 pm
20 Aug 14
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I can’t classify myself as bulimic, but I have definite issues with eating everything in sight. Yes, fasting as trained me to know I can be in control.

I am working to extend this feeling of control to the non-fast days. I have chosen outside resources to deal with the emotions that I experience. I am trying to deal with the root causes of the emotions — mostly too much to do and not enough time — so I eat instead of whittle away at my to-do list. I also eat when worried, lonely or stressed.

I am currently working my way through the Kindle edition of this book:

Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat: How to Break Your Eat-Repent-Repeat Cycle by Michelle May

It seems to speak exactly to what my problems are.

I also have used Paul McKenna’s book:

Freedom From Emotional Eating and the IPhone app, I Can Make You Thin.

I have lost weight dozens of times. At 54, it is time for me to deal with the emotions that cause me to gain the weight back.

It is nice to realize I can be in control of my eating.

TracyJ

1:36 pm
20 Aug 14
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Hiya kosiejelly, what a great inspiring journey you’re on. I’m not bullimic but I definitely recognise the urge to eat the whole cake and only the fear of peer disapproval and shame preventing me from actually doing so. I’m guessing that it’s the rules and that element of selective control in 5:2 that you are responding to. I love that too.

We always had that family joke of when you bring out the pudding after dinner someone (usually me) saying “well that’s mine, what’s everyone else having.” the only thing is, for me, it was never REALLY a joke and it still kind of isn’t.

I can honestly resist ANYTHING on a fastday and can usually do so on a non-fastday too up to a point but it’s the knowledge that I do have more calories to play with and can overindulge without needing to feel bad about it (because it’s all within my allowance)that makes this lifestyle so doable for me.

kosiejelly

1:50 pm
20 Aug 14
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Amy C, I totally identify with the emotional eating. Boredom is my main trigger. Since starting the fasting, I’ve gone through books at a ridiculous rate as they stop me from being bored when my other half is working shifts.

I’ve tended to have a pattern overall of losing weight after a break up and then putting it back on when I meet someone and get happy. This time is the first time that I’ve lost weight when in a happy relationship, so really the first time I’ve actively taken control rather than just rolled with the circumstances, which is a really nice feeling and one I too want to keep.

I do like Paul McKenna’s eating recommendations but for some reason have never been able to put them into practice, especially the ‘eat slowly and stop eating when you feel full’ part.

TracyJ – I definitely feel the same about peer approval. We tend to have a lot of sweets, biscuits and cakes in the office at work (people see me as generous as I often bring things in but really it’s only been so that I’d have something to snack on in the day) and sometimes the only reason I don’t eat more is that I think people will comment.

Today is a fast day and there are thorntons chocolates and jellies and some biscuits only a few feet from me but I know I won’t have any today. I also know I can have some tomorrow if I want and that’s part of what makes the fast days easier.

Amy C.

3:35 pm
20 Aug 14
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I can’t put Paul’s recommendations into practice either. I eat quickly and I clean my plate. Perhaps I might slow down, but cleaning my plate is part of me and I can’t see how throwing food that I prepared away will help me lose weight.

The latest book I am reading suggests throwing out the word control and replacing it with “in charge.” The nuance makes a difference to me.

kosiejelly

9:40 am
18 Sep 14
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I’m now just over 7 weeks into my fasting and the scales have registered me at a stone down from where I started. If I ignore the first week (assuming most of that was water loss) then I’ve been losing at about 1 lb per week.

But just as importantly, if not more so, is that I haven’t once binged and purged in that whole time. This is probably the longest I’ve been in a very, very long time where I haven’t done it. I’ve thought about doing it, but never had the old urge that used to blow reason away and lead to me losing control. Now it’s more like a thought of ‘if I were the person I used to be I’d probably eat all that cake and then some more food and then purge but I’m not that person now so it isn’t an option’.

I do feel though that if I hadn’t seen any weight loss that I could quite easily give up on the plan and go back to old habits, so I have to be very wary of that. But for now, I’m content with my eating habits and it’s a good feeling.

Lichtle

10:35 am
18 Sep 14
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@kosiejelly WELL DONE!! keep going, you are doing so well. You should be proud of yourself. Think of it like that: You are now caring for yourself. I think everybody can binge and relate to your issues to a degree. The main point is, if it should happen, there is always the next fast day just around the corner to re-set the eating habit and not be downhearted or discouraged if it happens. Be kind to yourself.

TracyJ

2:22 pm
18 Sep 14
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Hiya kosiejelly,

Well done so far & I’m so glad that you’ve acknowledged here that you may have troubles ahead if/when you plateau. I would just like to say that you WILL plateau at some point, so it’s good that you’re being mindful of it now and are already preparing yourself – that will be half the battle.

I’m on a major plateau myself right now and have been for several months but I knew it was coming (as I upped my exercise by 400% in February) and although it is disheartening, I am continuing with the 5:2 and don’t intend to stop.

The thing that makes the diet worthwhile for me over and above any weight losses are the health and fitness benefits I have discovered along the way. So I’d recommend you start noticing changes in your body. Has your lung capacity increased? Do you ‘feel’ fitter, faster, stronger? Have any skin issues cleared up since you started on 5:2? Is your blood sugar level and your BP ‘perfect’ these days? Are you resisting seasonal bugs that others around you are falling like flies to? Are your periods unusually regular, light, painless? Watch out for things like that, pay attention to them, note them down and remember them when you hit a plateau. Plateaus don’t always last as long as mine has and most people seem to push through the odd stall in a few weeks but if you’re getting more from 5:2 than JUST weight loss it will be easier to continue for those reasons alone.

glitter1991

10:00 pm
6 Feb 15
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Sooo glad there is a post on the forum that relates to bulimia/anorexia. I have had an eating disorder for 10+ years. I feel like my eating is out of control and i also tried the 5:2 several years ago but i gave up because it disturbed my sleeping pattern and had insomnia. I really want to start 5:2 again to get in tune with my body and find my hunger signals again instead of mindless eating!!!

xxxx

kosiejelly

10:14 pm
8 Feb 15
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Hi glitter1991. I think if you can do the 5 2 and avoid the insomnia issues it can definitely help you regain some measure of control over your eating.

I’m currently struggling. My fast days are fine but I’m eating too much on my non fast days. However, without the 5 2 I think I’d be totally back where I started.

The most important thing for me is that I haven’t purged since I started back in aug/sep and that’s a really good thing for me. And while I’m eating too much it’s nowhere near as bad as it used to be, not even close. So I’m carrying on even if I lose no weight. I may not be totally in control but I do have some control and that’s important.

Good luck with it.
Josie

prestonam

1:04 am
12 Feb 15
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Hi Ladies, I’m so glad I found this thread. All the others I found someone always said you shouldn’t be doing 5:2 if you have an eating disorder. Grrr it annoys me because there is so many other positive things that come from 5:2 other than losing weight. Why can’t I have these too? haha anyway rant over.

I was diagnosed officially about 2 years ago with Bulimia nervosa, i don’t purge I exercise & extremely restrict & binge. I have been struggling the last month or so with fast days. I think it’s because I know all the rules your not meant to be on a diet etc so I panic & convince myself to eat something then eat all the pies haha! I have even been convincing myself I deserve more fast day cals because I exercise so much – I know this is bull. I started this because of my IBS & will continue it because of it.

Anyway it’s great hearing that 5:2 is helping others with ED’s. I just hope I can pull myself together as my IBS is coming back. My housemates are starting 5:2 on Monday with me so that should hopefully make things easier. I can focus on them. 🙂

thehiddenyogi

10:59 pm
17 Jul 15
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Hi kosiejelly and everyone else on this topic,

It’s really so good to hear about other people like myself. I always felt like such an animal because I’d do the exact same thing: Look at a cake and be unable to even fathom how someone could take one bite and say “mmm, that’s tasty. alright I’m done with dinner now let’s go”. Or when people wouldn’t finish their plate of food and then say “I’m stuffed.” Whereas, I was always the type of person to even finish another person’s food for them. And I remember times at parties when I’d sneak away into the corner to have another brownie or other such treat.

I’m more like you, prestonam; I don’t purge, I just go super heavy on the exercise and enter periods of severe restriction. I’ve realized though that the bingeing for me stems from expecting so much from myself in terms of health, and then feeling overwhelmingly guilty at even one little treat or bite to the point of then throwing away the entire day and going crazy on the indulging.

So good to hear you all have been seeing success in “taking charge” of your body and mind with fasting!