I don't want to be the fat mother-of-the bride

This topic contains 11 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  RES 8 years, 10 months ago.

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  • I’m 58, 5ft 6in and weigh 13st 8lb. My daughter has just got engaged and is getting married in September 2016. I don’t want to be the fat motb.

    My ex will be there and he already makes snide comments about my weight. Just to add to the incentive!

    I did a couple of weeks before Christmas, but today it starts for real. 5:2 in January then see if I need to move to 4:3. Anyone else aiming for a wedding?

    Hi Carnelian
    Would love to join you on the ‘new wedding body’ journey and hopefully a lifestyle change for good. I’m 60 5’7″ and in kilos weigh 109. Ouch. It’s out there now!

    I’m aiming for a 9k loss by end of March 2016, but any loss will be good.

    Have tried lots of different methods and have problems with plateaus which help me give up.

    Started my first proper fast day yesterday. Surprisingly easy but needed to get the family cued in so they didn’t put temptation in my way. I even managed to put lunch on and sit with them without eating – felt quite nonchalant about it. My trigger is consuming food. First taste and I just want to keep going. So it’s easier not to start. For dinner cooked a lovely chicken with sumac, steamed carrot and cailiflower with chives and a slice of baked aubergine with baked cherry tomatoes. I honestly felt I had variety and it was filling and really yum after a day without. My other downfall is the after dinner munchies. This time having the fast day boundary made me more mindful and I went to bed earlier to read (away from pantry) and not get too tired to make sensible food decisions. Look forward to sharing adventures in 5:2 with you. 😊

    Hi Carnelian and RES,
    Just popping in to reassure you that you can knock their socks off at your upcoming weddings! I started 5:2 Sept 14 because of long standing weight issues and arthritic knees, my sons wedding (Oct 15) was an added incentive. This way of eating has been my first successful way of losing weight and changing my bad habits forever! I lost 23 kgs in 15 months and wore a lovely dress to my sons wedding – first time out of trousers in 30 years! Many guests did not recognise me. What an amazing feeling.
    But the best thing has been the incredible change in my tastes. Sugar is definitely addictive in whatever shape or form it takes. I can honestly say I no longer crave it. Just follow 5:2 for a while, give your body time to get used to fasting. Lots of good info on these forums. And be patient. It wont happen overnight, but stick with it and it will happen! The best psychological ‘trick’ is the fact that you no longer feel denied – you are not ‘dieting’, you can have that thing you crave ‘tomorrow’. 9 times out of 10 you will no longer want it the next day, but its a great way to fool yourself.
    And RES many of us on here agree about not starting eating in the first place. Keep away from food and keep busy, the hunger pangs pass quickly. Dont be hard on yourself if your fast fails, just try again the next day that suits your lifestyle.
    The effort will be more than worth it, trust me!

    Hi Res,
    Thanks for saying hello. It would be great to have someone to buddy up with on the journey! I’m finding the fasting days vary. My first one this week was easy, but I was hungry all day yesterday – so probably ate 2 apples more than I should have. On the other hand 2 apples isn’t the worst thing I could have eaten!

    My husband is happy to do this with me as he wants to shift 3-4kg. We did this in 2014 and he lost 10kg quite easily. I have to say I struggled, but I had other health issues that made it harder. This time I’m determined to stick to it.

    C.

    Hi Nama,

    Thanks for your post. It’s really helpful to hear from someone someone who has succeeded and to hear your tips.

    I think the biggest thing that appeals to me about this way of eating is that it fits in with the rest of life without feeling that I’m restricting myself too much. Hope the sugar thing works too!

    C

    Hi Carnelian and Nama
    Wow that is impressive I’m hopeful for a similar result. My first two fast days had a spectacular result: lost two kilos on the morning after the second fast day! Was on cloud 9 but got suspicious and checked again the next morning and really only 500 grams. But hey the plateau is broken and a loss is still a win! Reading all the threads have reassured me slow and steady is the way to go on this plan.
    Went out to lunch with friends to Bistro G (lovely French restaurant on the river) and discovered a few interesting things. Both friends were claiming the heavenly delights of onion soup – which I’m sure it was, and normally I’d cave in to peer pressure, but I didn’t want to spoil all the hard work of the fast days. While the soup is yummy it does have a fair layer of cheese on top. So I stood my ground and said no thanks to the soup and just enjoyed the conversation while they swooned over their onions and cheesy topping. And for the first time I noticed that it was perfectly fine to be different – it didn’t stop them from enjoying their choice and I felt ok: no great hunger pangs and perfectly comfortable just watching on. I had an octopus salad and a side of green beans which were delicious. I did give in to the deserts but since we were sharing I just had a spoon of each taking a tip from the French author on why French women don’t get fat: Keep talking and just enjoy a small amount if you must. (Actually I have been to France and saw plenty of robust women (although to be fair they could have been tourists)). At the moment we are having good weather and am trying to boost the healthy lifestyle with more exercise-bit of beach swimming. Best part is that it’s far away from the kitchen and I brought a few pieces of fruit instead of chicken mayo sandwiches. That seemed to work too. How is it going with you so far? Chin up and carry on is the motto!
    Cheers RES

    Hi Res,

    I’m losing about 500g/1lb a week after 2 fasting days. I guess that is a healthy amount to lose.
    Well done for resisting the onion soup. I still have Christmas cake left in the house but I’m leaving it for my husband. I’ve hidden it away so I don’t see it too often. That’s a lot of my problem – if I see something I want to eat it but if it isn’t there I don’t even think about it.
    I’m swimming too, but in a pool in a sports centre. We’re having a mild winter but it’s far too cold for the beach in the UK! Whereabouts in Oz are you?

    Hi Res,

    I’m losing about 500g/1lb a week after 2 fasting days. I guess that is a healthy amount to lose.
    Well done for resisting the onion soup. I still have Christmas cake left in the house but I’m leaving it for my husband. I’ve hidden it away so I don’t see it too often. That’s a lot of my problem – if I see something I want to eat it but if it isn’t there I don’t even think about it.
    I’m swimming too, but in a pool in a sports centre. We’re having a mild winter but it’s far too cold for the beach in the UK! Whereabouts in Oz are you?

    Hi Carnelian
    Well done. It does feel promising to have success early on – there have been efforts in my past which were complete failures. I’ve been pouring over the book again and been reassured that the small steady loss is most likely to be F. A. T. So hurrah for that. The exercise has also been a key ingredient this time round. I have a bike which I ride around a big block early in the morning before most people are up (not a virtue more a vanity) and just having a go at swimming again. I’m in Melbourne so hence the warm weather (can you believe today will be 41 Celsius ! I just feel like a beached whale in that kind of heat.)

    Once I’m back at work I will try a gym. Not my thing really but perhaps a short burst will help get me in shape (although round is a shape (old joke – sorry!)) I like the word svelte: sensational, vivacious, energetic, lean, tall, elegant. Think I will stick that on the fridge. I’m not in favour of fat fotos they just depress me.

    I’m the same as you with food – too many years of being told about starving children in Africa and I should not waste food. If I see it I will eat it. Have done a big rummage through the pantry and have gotten rid of most contraband. Anything which is cake or chocolate or biscuity is not mine and therefore I’m not allowed (that’s the theory and has worked so far). Are you in London? I do hope you are safe from those awful floods – wet and cold is a real disaster.

    All the best – tomorrow is my next fast day and then I will try an ‘official’ weigh in. Good luck on the journey😊 res

    Yay! A little happy dance. I’m now 106.8! am looking forward to the gp visit now: she will still growl but not too loud I hope😊
    How are you going ?
    Cheers RES

    I’m new to this WOE, and I’m lurking around the board, but I just want to reiterate something Nama said

    “The best psychological ‘trick’ is the fact that you no longer feel denied – you are not ‘dieting’, you can have that thing you crave ‘tomorrow’. 9 times out of 10 you will no longer want it the next day, but its a great way to fool yourself.”

    To me this is key. I feel like this should be called the ‘one day diet’, cause I only feel like I’m restricting myself for one day – and I can totally do one day. The next day is the day I get to eat whatever and even though I will stay under my TDEE, the thought that I can eat whatever makes me feel that I’m not being denied or subject to months of being restricted – which is totally just too depressing and overwhelming to think about.

    Hi Jay
    You are so right – that trick was really useful yesterday for me. It was cold (we dropped 20 degrees from 41 to 18) and I found it harder to resist nibbling something because I felt so chilly. But I reminded myself to have it the next day and found the thick explorer socks and went to finish a project to distract me from food and it worked. This web is a really useful thing too because when I feel really down reading the posts helps to build courage. If others can do it so can I. 👍.
    Thanks for the comments much appreciated.
    RES

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